During five tough years caring for Dad, who got a 5-year cancer prognosis in 2015, and Mum, a disabled stroke survivor, I struggled mentally.
Working full-time while juggling caregiving and life, in general, chipped away at my mental strength.
I powered through these years, drawing strength from my body, mind, and soul/emotions. Mostly, I managed to stay resilient and focused, but not without a few bumps along the way.
In this blog, I’ll share my experience and tips for gaining mental strength and improving concentration and memory as a caregiver and working professional.
Also, my advice – based on my story and what I know now – to prioritise self-care to avoid mental breakdowns and a hospital stay for chronic illness, as I experienced.
Gaining mental strength & staying resilient
- Block out excess noise and strive to create a sanctuary for the mind – social and digital media harmed my mental health by making me live life in the fast lane. I burned the candle at both ends, was in a constant state of anxiousness, relentlessly impatient, and always information-hungry. Upon deactivating my apps and accounts, I felt the weight lift from my shoulders. I enjoyed the scenic route of the slow lane in life and used the time I now had to focus on only real-life priorities.
- See the world through the eyes of a child – strive to live each day through the wondering eyes and mind of a child, exploring new sights, nature, sounds, smell, touch, and taste. By exploring and learning new and exciting things through our senses, we release the stress hormone cortisol from the mind and body. Finding and engaging the simpler things in life, like nature and wildlife, we inject feel-good endorphins to relieve pain, reduce stress, and improve well-being. Based on the 5 4 3 2 1 Grounding Exercise, I share my top 10 sensory activities to boost happiness.
- Lean on and draw strength from loved ones, trusted communities, and networks – we are never alone. In the UK, around 3% of the population meets the definition of the Sandwich Generation. This equates to approximately 1.3 million of us caring for and supporting older relatives and dependent children. While supporting Dad through cancer, I opened up to friends, colleagues, and online community members through Macmillan. I found that everyone I spoke to had experienced the same, was still on the journey, or knew others going through the same thing. ‘Strength in numbers’ comes to mind.
Boosting concentration & memory
- Create more valuable time by deleting or deactivating social and digital media apps and accounts – the main reasons for doing this and the benefits are highlighted above. But in the context of boosting concentration and memory, this eliminates unnecessary distractions and buys us invaluable time. Time to create schedules and daily routines, which not only strengthen the mind because they free us from worrying and stressing about life responsibilities, appointments, and caring duties but also help us focus and remember better. They do this by helping us reduce multitasking, focus on the task at hand, live in the moment, and care for ourselves by resting and sleeping better.
- Building on the tip of seeing the world through the eyes of a child – I’ve learned several practices to improve my memory focus and concentration. In no particular order, I find spending time in nature and walking highly effective, getting a good night’s sleep, making time for yoga or pilates, taking regular breaks, enjoying a drink soaking in nature either daydreaming out a window or in the garden and listening to music usually in the car.
- Brush your teeth with your non-dominant hand – studies show that exercising our brains this way leads to better focus, memory, and creativity! The bonus is that brushing with our opposite hand can also lead to better oral hygiene. A brilliant brain training exercise to try.
Prioritising self-care to avoid mental & physical breakdowns
- As a caregiver, “an empty lantern provides no light. Self-care is the fuel that allows your light to shine brightly”. I learned the hard way in my caregiving journey by neglecting self-care. As a result of skipping meals regularly, sleeping only a few hours a night, and running hard on empty for 5-years, my health suffered and deteriorated. I suffered two mental breakdowns through exhaustion and an episode of acute respiratory illness stemming from chronic asthma that hospitalised me for a week. Here’s how my transformative health and well-being started, and – based on my story and experience – how to prioritise self-care to avoid mental and physical breakdowns:
- How to look after ourselves as Caregivers
- Why it’s important for Carers to self-care and 5 benefits
- How to practice mindfulness and eat well for mental health
- How to breathe well and improve asthma
- Best holidays to re-energise the mind, body, and soul
- How to combat (caregiver) stress, anxiety, exhaustion, and get strong mentally
- Why a plant based diet is great for the body and allergy sufferers
- How to plan for Autumn/Winter wellness
- How to look after mental health: strategies and action plans
- What things make eczema, asthma, and body inflammation worse
